Dear ODS: My Boyfriend has Food IssuesDear ODS, My boyfriend is a disgusting eater. Gross food like everything is fried and no vegetables and too much meat. His table manners are grotesque. I’ve told him that he needs to be better but he’s still not better and it’s grossing me out. Is it silly to break up with someone because of food? Thank you, Bfree2day Dear Bfree2day I don’t have any official information concerning this, but I’ve got to figure that food issues cause more problems in more families and relationships than any other issue. I don’t know if it’s a respect thing or a control thing or if food is just one of those things that acts as an unhappily perfect vehicle for every issue, but you are not in the slightest alone on this one. A whole bunch of people have a whole bunch of food issues. So no, it’s not even kind of silly to break up with your boyfriend because of food. I’m struck by the number of women who write to me looking for permission to break-up with their boyfriend. So again, you are in the relationship because it works for you and as long as kids are not involved, you can breakup for any reason you dream up. Now I know that you want to be splitting up for a healthy reason so that you are not running into future problems way down the line… but food counts. I mean think about how often you two share the same meal together. Not so much when you go out but when you eat at home, it is very difficult to be in a situation where you are constantly eating things you do not feel good about. And not only that, if you have to watch this person with whom you are to be sexual active continually pig out, then you are bound to be less active sexually to say the least. And what’s worse, if you do stick it out and this guy just doesn’t change his eating habits then you run the risk of becoming either naggy or despondent. After all, you’ve asked him to alter his behavior and he’s not doing it. I am, however, moderately concerned with your use of the phrase “be better” as that suggests you’re issues with him are not really confined to food. You can’t simply “be better” in life and people who tend to ask that of those around them are really asking that of themselves. I don’t know though, you’re the only one who knows where you are truly coming from on this one. Anyways, no, the answer to your question is no, it is not silly to break up with someone over food issues. To ask ODS a question of your own, simply address your question to Dear ODS at contact@onlinedatingsites.org. We cannot promise we will answer every single question, but we will do our best to cover as many as possible on the column. |
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