Women: troubleshooting your profile pictures
It’s tough out there for the single woman: most good men seem to be taken, and the remaining ones are saving themselves for Gisele Bundchen. The bar scene gets old very quickly, you already went on blind dates with all of your friends’ friends, and online dating seems the last hope for meeting a nice, normal man with a job and a car and good personal hygiene.
This is where you write a cute and funny profile, upload your sexiest pictures, and start to check your inbox every 15 minutes for matches, winks and other signs that men out there are interested in meeting you. But no messages come in for a few days; or worse, you get lots of unwanted attention from men out of the shallow end of the gene pool, retired truck drivers and potential sex offenders. What could have gone wrong?
And where is Prince Charming?
The answer may lie on the pictures you used on your profile.
On a previous article we went over the best way to choose from old pictures and – even better – take new ones. Now we will look at the effects of making wrong decisions when choosing your pictures.
Problem: you are getting no responses
Checklist:
- Is your picture clear enough to actually know what you look like? Make sure it is not dark, blurry, pixelated or grainy, otherwise it will be just as off-putting to potential matches as if you had posted no picture.
- Do you look friendly in your picture? However sexy your pout is, it will not make the best first impression on potential beaus, who may be afraid to approach you in case they unleash your anger. Make sure you have a pleasant, open expression!
- Is there a man in the picture? A picture of you sitting on your (male) best friend’s lap will send all the wrong signals and lead matches to think you are taken. That cute picture of you and your brother with your arms around each other may be better saved for something other than a dating profile.
- Do you look your best? You’d be surprised at how many unflattering pictures make it out there: eyes half closed, false double chins, flash red eyes. If you really don’t have another picture of yourself, TAKE a new one instead of using one that does you no favors.
Problem: your inbox is swarmed by trolls
Checklist:
- Are you revealing too much? If your pictures show a lot of skin, men will definitely be attracted… for the wrong reasons. If you want potential matches to actually read your profile and find out about your pets and your love of black and white films, do not distract them with a steamy picture that will monopolize their attention.
- Do you look “too” available? Photos of you lying in bed making bedroom eyes, or seductively eating asparagus – these are real pictures, I have seen them – will send out the wrong signals. I cannot believe I even have to spell it out, but I have seen way too many such pictures on the profiles of girls who claim to be looking for a real gentleman who will love and respect them. So here it is: if you look like a porn star or a stripper in your picture, men will assume you are one. Those who want that kind of woman will make a go for it, and the nice boys will most likely not contact you.
- Although it may seem a repeat of point 1, this happens so often it deserves its own point. However proud you are of your décolleté, it should not be the focal point of your profile picture, and even less the feature of several pictures. Don’t you hate it when men talk to your cleavage instead of looking you in the eyes? Same thing here.
Choose pictures that show the real you in the best possible light, and you’ll give yourself the best odds for meeting a man who really likes you.
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